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RELIGIONS OF THE WORLD Taoism: Shit Happens. Hare Krishna: Shit Happens Rama Rama Ding Ding. Hinduism: This Shit Happened Before. Islam: If Shit Happens, Take A Hostage. Zen: What Is The Sound Of Shit Happening? Buddhism: When Shit Happens, Is It Really Shit? Confucianism: Confucius Say, "Shit Happens." 7th Day Adventist: Shit Happens On Saturdays. Protestanism: Shit Won't Happen If I Work Harder. Catholicism: If Shit Happens, I Deserve It. Jehovah's Witness: Knock, Knock, "Shit Happens." Unitarian: What Is This Shit? Mormon: Shit Happens Again & Again & Again. Judaism: Why Does This Shit Always Happen To Us? Rastafarianism: Let's Smoke This Shit. Southern Baptist: Send Us Money And Shit Won't Happen. CALVINISM: Shit happens because you don't work hard enough. HEDONISM: There's nothing like a good shit happening. MOONIES: Would You Like To Buy Some Shit? STOICISM: This shit is good for me. ZOROASTRIANISM: Shit only happens half the time. CHRISTIAN SCIENCE: Shit is in your mind. Environmentalism: You produce shit, so you have to eat it. Socialism: Sorry, we are out of shit today. Feminism: That's not funny! Atheism: There is no shit. Atheism: Can you believe this shit?

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