Kelsey Bjarnason

 Here's one related to me by an acquaintance, in regards to the (as I
 recall) Morons.

 One fine afternoon, two of them came knocking at the door.  Ken, being
 the generally convivial sort that he is, invited them in.  They sat down
 in the kitchen, where the morons started pulling out bibles, books,
 pamphlets, and other assorted implements of destruction.

 Ken, meanwhile, had put the coffee on.  After some 5 or 10 minutes of
 small-talk, the coffee was ready, and Ken offered them a cup.  They
 politely declined, upon which Ken asked them, "Well, how about a beer?"

 "Do you believe in God?" came the inevitable question.

 "Oh, of course.  All my fellow members of the Flat Earth Society do."

 More pained expressions, and some hurried whispers and querulous expressions
 ensued.  One was distinctly overheard saying, "Does he really believe the
 Earth is flat?"

 After three hours of attempts at conversion, the two now-exhausted Bible
 thumpers rose to leave.

 "One moment, please," said Ken.  "I have listened to you for the last three
 hours.  I have listened carefully, and treated you with the respect you
 deserve.  Now I ask you whether you are willing to grant me the same
 respect?"

 "Oh, certainly.  What can we do for you?"

 "You can sit there and listen while I speak MY point of view.  You see, I'm
 a Satanist."

 Which he proceeded to do for the next three hours.  In the several years
 since, many door-knocking Bible bandits have been seen roaming the
 neighbourhood, yet not a one has ventured up his driveway.