Newsgroups: alt.religion.scientology
From: jamesp@agora.rain.com (James Price)
Subject: Scientology: a comedy in 3 acts
Message-ID: <1991Nov5.204745.23713@agora.uucp>
Sender: jamesp@agora.uucp (James Price)
Organization: Open Communications Forum
Date: Tue, 5 Nov 1991 20:47:45 GMT

The Church of Scientology in Three Acts

Anyone who doesn't know the history of Scientology, henceforth known by its fruit, will find it here.

L. Ron Hubbard, the founder of the Curch of Scientology, started as a madcap if hackish science fiction writer, and was even a friend of Phillip K. Dick in the 50's. Dick later satirized Scientology in a story in which the founder of a world cult, named Elron Hu, knows great ambition.

Real Life: Hubbard, at the time a used car salesman, bets he could create a church overnight, $50 says so. Within 20 years, he has tapped into the loneliness, the desperate desires of humanity and has grown a fortune and is estranged from consensus reality. Probably shizophrenic, Hubbard's crazy schemes and lunatic visions, mad plans of ambition quickly brought a large following. Before a dozen or two books of his prose, carefully polished during his earlier career as a sci-fi author were sold, he was set. His wealth flowing in from from the US and international branches of Scientology, various governmental law enforcement agencies has questions to ask him. Hubbard fled to sea with an elite Sea-Org made up mostly of hot, sexy, pretty young women, decked in saiing suits, brass officers all, reminiscint of Hubbard's stint in the Navy (for which he later claimed was given innumeral medals; none were awarded him). With a hodge-podge of philosophy, conspiracy, and psychology, his illogical but drugging books poured ceaselessly out, like a bad dream.

I could tell you of the 2 times I went in for their "free personality test". The people stand out in front, and carney you into coming in for a "free" personality test. Only will take 20 mins they say. (I think it would have to take at very least two hours, as you need to mark 200 questions with your answers. At 3 a minute this is over an hour. Then they grade it and let you watch a highly fictional film, which is a fantasy biography of L Ron Hubbard. The film is at least half an hour long. After the test is "graded" they call you into a private office where, from the tests data, they plot your personality graph on a chart. I have done a close comparison of the chart and the test and it is easily broken, tho they won't tell you about it. Every tenth queston applies to a catagory (Aggressiveness+ or Passive(-)) and the idea is if you check the N+10th questions, you can find out what they EXPECT you to say. If you don't "dread the thought of death" you are given a point in the Depression catagory, etc. I had a great time going through the test and finding out what they wanted you to say, and didn't want you to say. Now, when your test is graded, they take you into a private office and "explain" it to you, and then try to sigh you up for remedial sessions of their mixed up counseling.

They try to get you to buy a book, or a class, or some time on the E-meters (more on theose later) and to sign this contract. Called the Covenant.

"I will work for the Church of Scientology for (1.5) (2) (5) [check one] years without expectation of a guarenteed pay (buried in legalese to sign, not read) or I will revoke full PUBLIC price for all therapy sessions I have recieved......."

If you try to get out, BOOM, they charge ya going rate, which ain't cheap. That is, they charge you the public price for evrything you've done. People have put over $50,000 into therapy in a single man/year. And that's club prices. I said, no way I'm gonna sign, so they brought in the Heavy.

Heavy> Here you sign these now OK. Me > No way man, I'm outta here.... Heavy> Look at this. (takes out E-meter. Fiddles and tweaks dials, seems to self-consciously look at lighted indicators.) HOLD THESE! ME > (thinkin- isn't that jus a voltometer? yes, it is, hmm..) Sure. (Hold them) Heavy> I'm gonna pinch you now, and it will set off engrams and make the needle jump. ME > OK, (hmm, if he does, why don't I let go the cans just a little with my palms) and the needle DROPS, a little.

we repeat it, he doesn't understand why it won't work. I say it must not really work, cruise.

Second time I saw two friends going in, couldn't keep them out, so I went in with them. hr to take the test. Mine came out nearly optimum, I played the system. Theirs were looking pretty bad. Did I mention the total fiction and hyperbole on film they make you watch in a little theater? So they tried to squeeze Friend A for a $50 hardcvr book, Friend B too smart. 3 hours later, no lie, we escaped with the excuse of going to move the car, after the trick for moving it for the meter didn't trick the Gestapo guards. They realized I wasn't going for it so they singled me out, took 2 friends into room to grade, and told me that I did "know where the door is at". Said I wasn't leaving without them, they said I have to. I said Ok, let me tell them I was going. No. I'll wait then. Sit down and make them drag me out. They retreated, asking me to take a seat. I went to the BBoard while unattended, and posted was a very embarsassing: (70 lines: I, xxx yyy did act in extreme cowardice and betrayed not only my org but my duty to it. My obligation to the org comes before all else, etc, etc, ad nauseum...) Caught, the girl screeched, "WHAT do you think you're doing THERE!?!" I said, "i was reading this public msg, this one here that says, May It Be Publically Known, msg above." She asked me to be seated, after a legtrh of time my friends and I escaped. To this day I believe that a large gorilla in the center got the nod to come after me, subversive that I was, and thought I saw him tailing us to the car. A very unnerving time....... (i guess im just "paranoid", eh?)

"Scientology" is a amorphous mass of pseudo-science, bunk, fabrication, dreams of a madman. Even L. Ron's death was mysterious; he may have been dead for years before Sci,Inc. admitted it, in their famous news release: (paraphrs) "The entity known as L. Ron Hubbard no longer has need for the encumberance of a physical form". He is now like an energy creature, pure knowledge, truth, beauty, justice and wisdom I suppose. The scramble to consolidate the holdings must have been intesense, oh, the power struggles.

My apologies for such a long post; flames and comments to net, /dev/null, or jamesp@agora.rain.com James Net: jamesp@agora.rain.com "Justice is incidental to law and order." Globe: 45 31 25 N 122 40 30 W - J. Edgar Hoover Unity not uniformity | NBC =3D GE "Reading musses up my mind." - Henry Ford

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